Begging for One Day
by Sophia.Love.Linstead
Summary: Set 4x23. Jay defies Hank, unable to drop the case knowing Erin is wrapped up and involved. When things go terribly wrong, will Erin be there for Jay? Or will they always be begging for their 'one day'.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: So I've finally written a finale fanfic. This is idea one of two... ;)**

 **Eh, don't know how I feel about it...**

Begging for One Day – Part 1

"You've made the right decision Lindsay." I nod once, avoiding eye contact.

"Yeah." The word feels like a lie, gut-wrenching pain filling me at the thought of leaving Jay behind.

We're not together now, but if I left Chicago we would be officially done.

The thought makes me feel sick; I try and distract myself.

The promise of one day and growing old together in Wisconsin will be forever lost, no finding our way back from this.

I take a deep breath remembering I have no job here, I need a fresh start and I'm doing this for Bunny.

The last thought leaves a bitter feeling behind so I repeat the first two reasons again, trying to convince myself.

The buzzing of my cell phone pulls my attention; I frown at the caller ID.

"Hank?"

"Erin." Instantly I'm on high alert, my heart beating rapidly in my chest.

"What happened?" My question is frantic, dread filling me at the sound of Hank uttering my name.

"Jay's been shot." All the air leaves my lungs, my heart dropping into my stomach.

"What?" My whisper is harsh.

"I'm sorry."

"Who?" I shake my head, hand coming up to cover my mouth.

"I don't know. I found him like this." Hank's gruff voice is the last thing I need as comfort right now, all I need is the warm tones of Jay's voice.

"Found him? I don't understand." I stumble back to the wall, unable to carry my weight with the thoughts racing through my mind.

"At Bunny's." In desperate need to ascertain assurances he's okay and to rush to be by his side, I choose to let this line of questioning drop for now.

"How bad?" I hold my breath, waiting for his reply.

"It's bad Erin."

"Oh god." I pull the phone away, sickness consuming me as the world I know crumbles around me.

I hear Hank's loud voice, pulling me back to reality as the phone finds my ear again.

"Ambulance is on its way. But I knew you would want to know straight away."

"Damn it. I'm coming. Hank, I'm coming." I don't even notice I'm crying as I push past Special Agent Spencer.

"Bunny." I barge into the room, eyes like fire.

"Honey?"

"Don't." I thrust my hand out in front of her shocked face.

"What's wrong?"

"Jay's been shot." The words feel foreign as they tumble from my mouth.

"Well, it's not my fault." I scoff at her, shocked at the first words coming from her mouth.

I shake my head in disappointment when I realize I shouldn't be surprised.

"Nothing ever is, is it?! The man I love has been shot and that's what you have to say to me? You're daughter?" My tone is dripping with venom, eyes showcasing my hurt.

"No, of course not honey. Come here…" Her embrace looks far from comforting or welcoming.

"Don't. I can't believe I was going to give up Chicago for you… give up _Jay_ for _you_. You never showed me love, but Jay has shown me the world. He's done so much for me… I'm not leaving. You're on your own. Rot in jail for all I care."

I rush out of there and to my car, not an ounce of sadness as I leave my mother behind to face the consequences of her actions.

I speed the short distance to the hospital, praying to any god that will listen to save Jay. I run into the ED entrance searching around frantically, finally my eyes land on a terrified Hank.

"Hank, where is he?" My eyes find the gurney racing along side him and I can't look away.

"Jay!" My voice sounds hysterical even to my own ears, as my feet take me to his side, running along side as I listen to the paramedics update the doctors.

"Jay! Baby, I'm here." His face is so pale, eyes closed and an oxygen mask over his mouth.

My eyes drop to his abdomen where I see red seeping through the white bandages packed against his wound, his shirt ripped.

"Erin." My name is soft as it falls through his lips, eyes opening slowly.

He reaches up to remove his mask as I continue to cry, one hand is tightly in his and the other cups his cheek.

"I'm here. Stay with me okay?" I whisper as I drop my forehead to his.

"I love you. I'm sorry." I shake my head fiercely, pressing my lips to his.

"Stop it. I love you too, alright? Come back to me. You need to come home." I'm begging him through the tears, failing in my fight to stay strong.

I kiss him again, salty tears on both our cheeks.

"Please fight this." I place one last kiss on his forehead as we reach the treatment room and Dr Choi starts calling out directions.

I hold onto Jay's hand as long as I can, until Hank pulls me back to let them work.

"I'm not going anywhere." I don't look at Hank, knowing he heard me and understands exactly what I mean.

We stand there silently as we watch them work, cutting off the rest of Jay's shirt and calling out a diagnosis that sounds terrifying.

"We need an OR. I can't control the bleeding." I cover my mouth with my hands, when we hear the monitor altering the doctors to a problem with his heart.

"He's coding."

"We're losing him!"

"Oh god. Jay, please come back…" Hank holds me closer as I sob, my fingers gripping his arms tightly.

"Get her out of here."

"No. Please. Save him. Jay!" Hank pulls me away, as I struggle against him. I cry harder when I can no longer see Jay, can no longer convince myself he's still here.

I'm left blind to worry if the man I love is still breathing. If his heart is still beating.

The same heartbeat I listen to at night as I rest my head on his chest, the sound lulling me to sleep.

Will I ever have those moments of calm again?

After what feels like an eternity but is only a few minutes Maggie approaches us with a soft smile.

"Maggie?" My voice is hoarse.

"They managed to get his heart started again, they've taken him to the OR. We will do everything we can for him. We'll keep you updated okay?"

"Okay. Thank you." I know the words are mine, but I don't even feel my mouth moving. My body is numb as I process the news.

"Umm. This did fall out of his pocket… we think he'd want you to have it Erin." My heart stops at the sight of the ring box in her hand.

"What?" It's barely a whisper, shock flooding my body. Hank's body is tense beside me but I don't turn to face him.

I'm crying as I reach my hand out to take the box, I caress the box gently before opening it slowly.

"Oh my god."

More tears fall as I take in the beautiful engagement ring; I run my finger over the diamonds before stumbling back into a seat.

I slowly pull it out and begin to slide it onto its rightful place when I pause, not wishing to steal this moment from Jay.

Softly I push it back into the box and force it shut loudly, I don't dare let go of the box.

I sit here clenching the ring box so tight, afraid if I let it go I would be letting Jay go as well.

* * *

"How is he?" I haven't taken my eyes from the box in my hands, images of the life we could have flashing through my mind.

I vaguely hear Al and the others asking Hank for an update.

"Is she holding a ring box?" Ruzek asks confused.

I stand suddenly and walk through the hospital, hoping to escape their looks of pity, knowing my life has been on a downward spiral for as long as I can remember.

My time with Jay the only happy time I can recall, knowing his wife is where it all went wrong. I wish he didn't push me away to deal with his PTSD, I wish we did a million things differently.

I'm angry Hank split us up as Partners, and that I welcomed it at the time. Jay would have never let me off the rails in that case, I know watching me spiral hasn't been easy on him.

The image of Jay pulling me off the suspect before I could raise the gun is crisp in my mind. He always sensed my moods, our actions in tune.

I open the ring box again; feeling like this could be the answer to our problems.

This could be our fresh start, with our bond only growing stronger as we are united as husband and wife.

No more secrets, no more lies.

Complete transparency as we truly learn to rely on each other and accept support, knowing we both need it to heal.

We can use our love to push through the hard times and come out the other side stronger than ever.

* * *

"Hey kid." Hank takes a seat next to me.

"Did you know?" I nod to the box in my hands.

"Do you think I'd send you off to New York if I did?"

"Probably. Not sure why you even tried. Especially for Bunny… when we both know she did this." The confession hangs between us.

"You need a job, and I don't think you're getting yours back. Not here."

"Admit it. You want Jay and I apart." I refuse to look at him.

"I guess I did."

"And now?" I feel him shrug next to me.

"I don't know. I'm starting to see, you and Jay will always be a part of each other. You were inevitable… and always will find your way back to each other. You both need each other."

"I was going to leave Chicago for a woman who never loved me." I let the sentence sit there, bitterness coating my mouth as Hank grunts.

"When the man I love… the man who shows his love for me is right _here_. He has always had my back…" I trail off, tears slipping down my cheeks.

"The man who truthfully, has made me feel the most love I've ever felt in my whole life… is right here in Chicago. Why would I go to New York for that _woman_? When Jay is here." Hank doesn't say a word, sensing I have more thoughts and frustrations to express.

"Jay's the most important person in my life, we got lost this year and that messed me up… and then all of this happened and so I fell back into old habits. Pushing people away… saving Bunny. I'm done with that. I can save Jay; he left me for a reason this year. And you know what? He can save me too. I'm okay with that now. It's how it's meant to be. He's the one." A piece falls into place, my outlook shifting when I admit my true feelings to myself.

I've accepted what we mean to each other, our shared feelings and that we can always save each other from our dark pits of despair.

"But you're job… I'm not sure I have any get out of jail free cards left."

"Then I won't be a detective. But I'll have Jay." Hank's hand covers mine.

"I'm proud of you."

"At least I hope I'll have Jay." The sentence causes a sharp pain in my heart.

"He'll be okay Erin, he's strong." The unbearable need for answers consumes me, pushing me to my breaking point.

"What happened Hank?" I finally ask, unable to quiet the noise filling my head anymore.

"I don't know…"

"Why wasn't he wearing a vest?"

"I told everyone the case was over. The FBI was handling it… I guess he couldn't let it go. I shouldn't be surprised, it involved you. And he's had it out for Bunny this case, wanting to rid you of her maybe. Wanting to protect you… so he went back to Bunny's to search. I had the same idea but by the time I arrived… I found him bleeding out." The image of Jay crumpled on the floor, blood spilling out and draining the life from his body is too confronting so I squeeze the ring box tighter.

"Who did this Hank? I need to find who did this."

"I know. I have the team working on this. They won't stop." The promise in his voice is strong.

"You don't think…"

"What?" He prompts, pushing me to finish the thought.

"Did Bunny kill Johnny? Did she send someone back to her apartment, to make sure we never found the evidence we need to prove she did? What if she's the reason he…" I close my eyes, not ready to face that idea yet.

"He'll make it Erin." He distracts me from my dangerous thoughts.

"He has to." I whisper fiercely.

 **A/N: It's late so this is the first part.**

 **My other finale fic idea is more... Jay finds out Erin is leaving but she's already at the airport. He rushes there. Forces his way onto the plane.**

 **'You can't leave'**

 **'Why not'**

 **'Because I want to marry you'**

 **I can't get it out of my head... don't worry I'll finish this one first. lol**

 **Hope it's okay... let me know your thoughts with a review :)**

 **PS. There are likely mistakes in this/ things that don't make sense... sorry, just go with it. haha**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Thank you for the reviews :) I really should do my other finale idea, but I have so many stories it's hard to keep up lol**

Begging for One Day - Part 2

"When are we going to find out anything?" I sigh exasperated as I pace in front of Hank.

"I'm sure we'll hear soon. You should sit down." I shake my head as I bring my thumbnail to my teeth and chew anxiously.

"Erin!" I turn quickly at the sound of Will's voice beckoning me.

"Will, any update?" My voice is smothered with hope, itching for an update on the only man I've ever loved.

"He's out of surgery. Looks like he's going to be okay." Will's eyes are glossy with unshed tears, relief evident in his posture.

"Thank god." My knees grow weak, a sob ripping through my chest in relief.

"Come here." He pulls me in for a tight hug. It's warm and comforting but not the Halstead's arm's I'm truly longing for.

"So he popped the question huh?" Will asks pulling away, raised eyebrow and disbelief hovering between us.

"Huh?" He nods down to the box in my hands.

"Oh. No… the nurses found it when he was bought in." My shoulders rise in a shrug, too many thoughts going through my head today. A whirlwind of events having brought me to this moment.

Doubt over my future with intelligence, Bunny's involvement in drugs and murder, agreeing to move to New York. Planning to leave the love of my life behind, without a word.

Finally and most heartbreaking; Jay's shooting.

The night he was almost taken away from me forever, whilst I was given a symbol that his love for me would last forever.

"Well, that's a way to ruin the surprise." I watch Will offer me a small smile, more in sympathy than anything else.

"So you knew?" I gesture to the ring, wondering if he was supportive of Jay's decisions.

More than that, wondering what lead Jay to this extreme.

"Of course. He had to ask me to get mums ring."

"Oh… so this was meant to be for you?" Fear grips my chest, guilt nudging me to let it go if it's not rightfully mine, but my heart never wanting to see it disappear.

"Nah. Mum always said whoever found the one first. Jay certainly won that… he knew it was you since the beginning."

"Really?"

"Yeah. He use to joke about getting the ring for you. But he was very serious this time. Truthfully, given our past he probably deserves it more anyway." He clears his throat awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Can I see him?" My mind pictures the strong and healthy Jay I know and love, desperately needing to see him.

"Yeah, he won't be awake for a few hours but I can take you to him." I close my eyes briefly, trying to prepare myself, as the Jay I'll see won't be the one I'm use to.

* * *

The first thought that crosses my mind is how small Jay looks; I've never seen him looking so fragile.

His pale skin and chapped lips call my attention as I slowly close the distance between us.

My hand is shaking as I reach out to caress his cheek before running my hand through his hair. I lean forward to kiss his forehead, noting the peaceful expression on his face.

I place a gentle kiss on his lips next, knowing he would always welcome it no matter the circumstance.

I look down at the ring box again, trying to organise my thoughts. Even though we are broken up, I know that is never permanent with us.

It could never be, we will always have a one-day.

As I sit down, one hand wrapped securely in his and one wrapped around the box, I realise he's made the decision that one day is now.

When he wakes up and I'm greeted with his sparking blue eyes I know it will be my turn to decide if one day has finally arrived.

I think back to almost losing him, to the terror still swimming in my veins at the thought of a complication or of never looking into his eyes again.

A life passes me by. Full of Jay's smiles, smirks and his musical laughter.

I don't think I can go a day without those, I think of a white dress and a magical day.

The magic crafted from sharing it with him, a man I never thought I'd find. We are far from perfect, but somehow perfect for each other.

A smile finds my face as I picture a little girl a mirror image of me, and a little boy just like his father, freckles and all.

Tears stream down my cheeks as I imagine sitting on the porch of his cabin in Wisconsin, our summers filled with the laughter of our children, and our hearts full of happiness when we finally have enough of the city and settle down together.

I stand quietly afraid to wake him, despite knowing rationally the meds are keeping him asleep. A small part of me hopes for him to defy the odds, stir away and let me look into his brilliant eyes.

Softly I lean my head on his chest, the position awkward but I'm rewarded with the strong beat of his heart.

Tears slip onto his chest while I don't move a muscle, the sound keeping me grounded to this moment.

"Please wake up Jay. Come back to me." The whisper is lost in the eerily quiet hospital room.

* * *

"Erin?" My heart skips a beat, eyes flying open.

The familiar voice is thick with sleep and then swallowed by a dry cough, but I would recognise it anywhere.

"Jay." I stand quickly, leaning over the bed and drinking in his features.

His blue eyes are soft and glazed as he stares up at me in wonder.

"Am I dreaming?" Something caught between a chuckle and sob escape my lips.

"No. I'm here." My forehead drops to his gently.

"Erin-"

"Shh." My finger rests gently over his lips; I soak up the contact before I move to get some water.

I bring the straw to his lips and watch him suck the water greedily; I press the nurse call button next.

"Don't." He tries to protest, grabbing my hand weakly and wincing from the movement.

I raise my eyebrow in question.

"I just want to be alone with you." The whispered confession warms my heart, sending my heart racing and my blood pumping.

"We will be. Just let the doctors assure me you're okay first." Jay studies my face, his eyes softening at what he finds.

"Fine." He concedes softly, a small huff slipping through his lips.

"Don't pout Jay Halstead." Heaviness lifts from my chest as we find our old groove; we're like two puzzle pieces finding their way back together.

"I thought I have a cute pout."

"That's me dude." I send him a wink as he smirks, enjoying the wit and humour flowing between us.

"It's about the only cute thing you have." I raise my eyebrow in challenge.

"Because you're so damn sexy." I roll my eyes, a giggle fighting it's way through despite my best efforts to muffle it.

"I really hope you're dreams don't include getting shot and waking up in hospital." He laughs at my banter, recalling his first question waking up.

"Don't make me laugh." He cradles his stomach as I grimace, reaching my hand to cover his gently.

"Sorry." I pull a face, conveying my guilt.

"They don't." He finally whispers.

"What?"

"My dreams include you." We're locked in the moment, heads leaning closer as our eyes drop to the others lips, feeling them drift closer with each gentle breath.

Our noses are touching when we register the sound of the door opening; we pull apart regretfully to greet the doctor.

We're silent for a few moments when the doctor leaves us alone, fumbling to find our place again.

"Everyone wanted to be here but they're working the case." My hands slip in my pockets, fingers brushing the ring box.

Anxiousness fills me immediately as I debate when to bring it up. Or if I even should.

I imagine myself slipping it back in with Jay's belongings, letting him take it home from the hospital with him. He'll think it's still his secret, never knowing I share it too.

"I'm just glad you're here." There's an edge of relief in his voice that hurts to hear.

"I wouldn't be anywhere else. Even if all I want to do is find this son of a bitch and make him pay for…" My voice breaks away, tears slipping down my cheeks.

Jay holds his hand out, I place mine in it softly.

I leave the other in my pocket, pulling strength and encouragement from the ring box.

"What were you even doing?" The question that has been burning through my mind since Hank called can finally be answered.

 **A/N: Well I guess not finally answered for you... just be grateful it's not the cliffhanger I almost left you with. ;) lol  
Sorry for the short chapter, work and migraines have been kicking my ass but I wanted to give you something before next week... because I have a very busy weekend planned lol**

 **Hope you all have a good weekend if I don't get another update done tomorrow :)**

 **Please let me know your thoughts. :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Sorry for the delay! Figured it was about time I update ;)**

Begging for One Day – Part 3

 _Previously_

" _I'm just glad you're here." There's an edge of relief in his voice that hurts to hear._

" _I wouldn't be anywhere else. Even if all I want to do is find this son of a bitch and make him pay for…" My voice breaks away, tears slipping down my cheeks._

 _Jay holds his hand out, I place mine in it softly._

 _I leave the other in my pocket, pulling strength and encouragement from the ring box._

" _What were you even doing?" The question that has been burning through my mind since Hank called can finally be answered._

There's a beat of silence as the question reaches him, his mind almost working out where to begin.

"You seemed so broken today at the precinct when you came by…" I think back to the encounter, regret creeping in as I play the conversation back, wondering if I drove Jay to continuing to pursue the case.

I remember his caring expression consuming me, the sun shining down on me having nothing to do with the warmth I felt.

My hand on his chest and his presence taking the cold away; even if only for a short time.

I look down to his hand cradling mine, knowing I missed his warmth the most. The loneliness I felt these past months, letting coldness take hold of me.

"I just wanted to protect you from her." It's simple but honest, his eyes surveying my face, looking for signs I'll push him away.

"You always have." My voice is nothing but a whisper, soft and soothing.

"I just wanted to help you… I wanted the truth. And I had this horrible feeling when Hank let Bunny go…" He drops his eyes, hand fidgeting in mine.

"And then when he said the FBI had the case…" He struggles to find his words; I hold my breath waiting anxiously, wondering if the shooting or me has him so lost.

One thing that's always constant about Jay; he's good with words and he'll always find just the right ones to shift my mood or make everything better again.

"I can't explain it Erin. But it felt like you were slipping away… like I was going to lose you for good, and I can't…" He trails off his blue eyes shining so bright with heartbreak.

"You could never lose me for good. We'll always find our way back to each other… I think we both know this by now." I release his hand, running my fingers through his hair before cupping his cheek.

"I'm not a fan on how this one panned out." The laugh bubbles through my chest without warning, seeing the trademark Jay smirk in place.

"Me either babe. I mean I'm good, but not 'take a bullet for her' good."

"I'd take a bullet for you any day Linsday." His eyes are shinning bright with mischief.

"How about I take the next one." I smirk back, enjoying the lightness creeping back into our life.

"Where would you take it?" I can see by his smirk he's thinking back to a conversation from the beginning of our relationship. Back when we thought it was just lust and fun, not realising what we were in for.

The intense love, sacrifice and hurt.

I wouldn't take a second of it back.

"You know how I take it." I raise an eyebrow, feeling the gentle swirl in my stomach as I watch his smirk drop.

"It's been a while, but nothing I'd ever forget." The heat between our gazes is almost too much, my cheeks flushing at the naked look in his eyes.

My hand dropping back to his halts the moment, knowing I have many more questions before we can give into any of the built up passion.

"So you went back to Bunny's?" I hold onto the information about the FBI and New York for the moment, noting his instincts were strong today. He sensed I was pulling away before I'd even had to look into his eyes and explain I was leaving Chicago.

Leaving him, my heart constricts at the thought.

"I figured solving the case was what I had to do." He shrugs gently, wincing at the pains shooting through his body, a reminder he got shot. My mind is still caught up on the FBI and his reasoning.

Without knowing it, he was holding onto me, onto us, with every fiber of his being.

He took a bullet; listening to his instincts telling him he was going to lose me, and fighting it with everything he could.

"I wanted to prove she shot Johny. Look, Erin. You might not want to hear it, but she did it… I _know_ it." He squeeze my hand, tugging on it to bring my attention back to him.

My eyes lose their hazy look as I meet his, nodding softly.

"I believe you… I'm done with her. She never showed me love. You have… I believe you." He's stunned into silence, eyes searching my face as he tries to piece everything together.

"This is _my_ fault Jay. Bunny is always taking things I love away… and tonight she almost took _you_ away." Tears stream steady down my cheeks, sobs begging to be released as despair grips my body.

"Baby, this isn't your fault. It _isn't_." Jay reaches his other hand out to loop in my jeans and pull me onto the hospital bed.

"I need you to believe that… and believe I'm never going anywhere. Ever." His fingers gently lift my chin, everything about him begging me to believe him.

The red box is digging into my thigh, letting his words ring truer than ever.

"Okay." I finally nod, knowing he won't move on until I consent.

"But someone came in while I was there… and I was an idiot. I've been distracted and he caught me off guard. I got a couple shots off, I hit him but he still fled." The blame of himself is strong, like it always is.

"Don't _ever_ go in without back up again." I lean forward, voice fierce as I plead with him.

"I won't."

" _No_. Promise me. I _can't_ lose you." My eyes are serious and full of tears; he finally nods when he realizes how serious I am.

"I promise."

"Thank you." I lean forward to kiss his forehead, knowing there are many truths that need to be confronted.

"You were kind of right… with your FBI suspicious… and me." I avoid his eyes.

"How?" There's something desperate in his tone that pulls my gaze back.

"I got offered a job in New York. I've been told I likely won't ever be a Chicago cop again." I let the information sit there, jumbled together and out in the open.

"Oh." His eyes drop to our joined hands for a moment, I use the time to slip my other hand from the confines of my pocket bringing the box out with me.

"Yeah." I shrug, waiting for his eyes to find the red box.

When his eyes finally find it, my heart is beating rapidly as his shocked blue eyes find mine.

"But I can't very well go, can I?" My voice sounds calm on the surface, a small pitch to it showcasing my nerves.

I watch his eyes find their familiar spark as hope spreads across his features.

"We're not together though Jay, so… why do you have this?" I gesture to the box, the moment passing quickly but my tone nothing but gentle and confused.

"You're all I think about. I wanted you to know I'm here for you, you aren't alone." There's truth to his words, passion overwhelming in his tone.

"And what? Proposal is the first thing to come to mind? To let me know you're here for me?" I can't hide the disbelief, knowing it's hiding my fear of getting hurt.

This man in front of me could break my heart more than any other person in my life.

In fact, he has.

"You've always been there for me Erin. Leaving you for my issues? That was dumb. The worst mistake I've ever made." Tears well in both of our eyes, Jay's tone is desperate, wishing I'd believe him.

"I know you're here for me. You've always had my back Jay."

"Not lately."

"I haven't exactly let you… or been welcoming." I shrug, the hurt from the past months coming back to drown me in emotions.

"I hurt you. I promised myself I would never do that, but I did." Jay shakes his head, anger and bitterness obvious.

"I forgive you. I know all about hurting those you love…" I think back to the dark hole after Nadia died. Knowing my actions hurt those close to me.

"I love you Erin." My heart swells, craving those words. It's like a dream hearing them after all this time apart.

"Did you think about this? Plan it? Or was it sudden?" I push aside the hope and love for the moment, needing answers before I open my heart again.

"I couldn't stop thinking about you Erin, and I knew I needed to prove to you that I'm here to stay. Always. Permanent. So I asked Will for Mum's ring." A tear slips down my cheeks, feeling a pull towards the man pouring his heart out.

"Every thought, every moment… you're all I think about." Jay trails off, his glossy as he repeats these words as if hoping I'll finally accept them.

"I've dreamed about you as my wife since the day I met you. I looked past your rough exterior and I knew you'd fall for my charm..." I share his smirk.

"And I hoped that one day you would be open to the idea of marriage." So much warmth is finding it's way to my heart; love fighting it's way back.

"So it was rash? Like your shot gun wedding in Vegas." I immediately regret my words and for lashing out, letting his past and his ex wife tarnish our proposal.

"This is it Erin. You and me, _now_. The time is right, it _feels_ right." He pushes on, ignoring my slip of hurtful words.

"Yeah…" I bite my lip in thought as I allow him to reach for the box and play with it thoughtfully.

"I _have_ thought about this since the moment we meet Erin. Asking Will for the ring might have been impulsive. But that's the kind of man I am. I carried this around waiting for the right time, I know without a doubt you're it for me. You're the one, and I want to marry you."

I open my mouth to speak, but shut it when I realize I'm completely speechless.

"I don't want to propose now. I want it perfect. You deserve the perfect moment." I work through my shock, trying to find the words to convey my feelings.

"It will be. It's _you_. I just want to be yours again." My hands cover his, the box wrapped securely in our grip.

"You always have been, always will." He whispers gently, nodding once.

"You promise?" I whisper softly, a smile stretching across my face.

"I do."

"You know it's not time to say 'I do' yet right?" I smirk down at him; he rolls his eyes as he chuckles at me.

"Oh really?" I nod as he reaches a hand up, his fingers looping in my hair and resting on the back of my neck.

He guides my head forward, lips within reach of his.

I wet my lips in anticipation as his nose brushes mine, my eyes fall closed as I feel his warm breath on my lips.

When his lips finally meet mine I sigh in pleasure as they move against each other. I welcome his tongue into my mouth and I moan as I reach up to cup his cheek.

"I needed a repeat of that earlier kiss. First in months and it was all salty from your tears." He pulls away to tease me, foreheads touching.

"Shut up, jack ass." His laugh is magical, the key to my automatic forgiveness as I pull him back in for another kiss.

We're smiling into the kiss, not wanting to part even when the need for air becomes painful.

"You know you still haven't asked me right?" I whisper against his lips, eyebrow raised.

"Ah. I guess not." I pull away, swallowing harshly as he opens the ring box.

"I would get down on one knee but you know..."

"Oh, were you shot? I hadn't noticed." I bite back flippantly.

"God I love you." He whispers.

"You better. Or you're in for a miserable life." He reaches for my hand, eyes lively.

"Erin Lindsay, you make me the happiest I've ever been. I don't want to imagine my life without you; I don't want another day to pass where we aren't together. Will you marry me?"

I nod tearfully, words escaping me. Jay smiles as he takes the gold ring from the box and slips it carefully on my left ring finger.

I lose the battle with my tears as I see it sparkling up at me, in it's rightful place.

" _Yes_ , of course. I love you." I whisper as I lean forward to kiss Jay, tears streaming down my cheeks.

"Another salty kiss." He mumbles against my lips, a giggle escapes as I feel nothing but joy.

His forehead rests against mine, his thumbs gently wiping the tears from my cheeks before kissing me again.

The following hours are spent in bliss, sharing kisses and dreams for the future. A future that will be ours, dreams that only have to achieve our happiness.

We realize that maybe we aren't perfect people, but we'll always be perfect together.

We'll always have a home with each other.

We drift off together in the hospital bed; it may not be our bed at home, filled with our distinct mix of scents and too many pillows.

But it's a bed, and it's ours to share.

After all this time apart, it's like a dream.

 **A/N: Like always, it's rushed... but I'm binge watching a show at the moment... so gotta get back to it haha :)**

 **I will try for an update on Reasonable Doubt tomorrow night, then maybe Fate Thursday. We'll see...**

 **Please leave a review and let me know your thoughts. :)**

 **Hope it was worth the wait!**


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